I have chosen my personal narrative for my portfolio because I think it is my best piece. As a personal narrative writer I need to write a seed story and not a giant watermelon topic. Also I need to tell the most important parts of the story. I need to include true, exact details and shows don’t tell with rich details. I need to stay inside my point of view. This will help me to write with true and exact details. Also I need to make sure stories tell not just what happens, but also the response to what happens. I need to write about a small episode, but it had big meaning for me. I also need to tell the story in a way that the reader can actually experience it from start to finish. It helps to record exact word a character uses (Dialogue). Also I need to convey strong feelings and they often show rather than tell about those feelings. Personal narratives writers need to include two and sometimes three small moments so that there is a sense that each story has a beginning, middle, and an end.

I think I wrote my personal narrative piece very well. The thing I like about it is that I included a lot of dialogue. Also I like that I wrote a lot of detail in the piece. Plus I wrote some similes. I think similes make the story more interesting. For examplel, in one part of the story I said, “I was just like a bay kangaroo because I was bouncing all over the place” and in another part I said, “I was so thirsty I could drink the whole ocean.” The last thing I liked about my piece was that I showed with detailed events instead of telling what happened. I think I did a good job. This helps the reader make a movie in their head. Those are the things I think it did well in my piece.

The things in my piece I think that I could improve are my editing. I had a lot of editing mistakes. That would make my story be a lot better. Also I needed to improve my revision because I had a lot of things like the conclusion that I could have made a lot better and that could of improved my story. Then there was a final thing I need to improve was my sentence variety. Overall with all these things I think I needed to improve I think I did really well.

This is a piece I wrote that I told about in the paragraph above. I think it is one of my best pieces.

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